The following personal story is one that needs to be told for so many reasons - but even as I sit down to write it there is a surreal feeling in the telling. 

It was a Wednesday morning 5 weeks ago when Julie rang me at home a couple of hours before we were to start work.   Three year old Sarah had a persistent cold and although Julie felt sure that our local GP would probably not recommend an antibiotic for her – Julie felt she still wanted the child to visit the doctor.  

Normally Julie takes her little girl to the doctor but on that particular morning she had a client flying up from Melbourne especially to see her and it was my day off.  We decided it would probably be a good idea if I took Sarah to the doctor on this occasion. 

I readied myself for the 9am appointment. 

When we arrived at the surgery Sarah was miserable with her cold but she was immediately distracted with some toys and books that were set aside in one corner of the doctor’s waiting room.  I was pleased to see her so preoccupied. 

Seeing Sarah happily playing I looked around the surgery for something to read.  I saw the usual pile of magazines on the table – no, I did not want to get absorbed in a lengthy magazine article that I probably would not have time to finish.  Then my eye fell on a wall stand containing health leaflets and I wandered over to take a closer look.  

There were about 10 different leaflets on the stand all neatly arranged in pockets.  As I cast my eye over them a small picture on one of the leaflets caught my eye.  I pulled that leaflet out of the rack to take a closer look.  

It was a leaflet on skin cancer.  The picture that caught my eye was a picture of a melanoma.  It looked exactly like a smeared large brown–black freckle I had on the calf of my left leg.  It had been there for a number of years. 

I looked at the picture more closely and then down at my leg. They did seem to be very much the same.  I sat down and looked at the picture again inconspicuously running my hand over the mark on my leg.  There was barely a bump there and certainly not the slightest trace of pain or discomfort… still the picture of the deadly melanoma had a remarkable resemblance to the mark on my leg.  

Many years ago I had suspected that freckle and showed it to a doctor at the time and he dismissed it as nothing…..but that was years ago and perhaps it had grown imperceptibly since then. 

Sarah Evans  

Suddenly Barry was standing at the top of the waiting room calling ‘Sarah Evans’ as he looked over at his small patient who had heard her name called - and then he acknowledged me with a smile. 

As Julie and I suspected it was confirmed that Sarah only had a cold but the doctor did detect some redness in her ear so an antibiotic was prescribed. Julie would be pleased that she decided to play it safe and take her to the doctor. Barry gave me the prescription and we were saying our good-byes when I noticed that I was still holding the skin cancer leaflet in my hand.   Something told me that I should at least relieve my own mind by showing him the mark on my leg there and then and ask him if he thought I should make an appointment to see him about it on another day.   He took a cursory look and said he suspected it was only an ‘age’ spot but that I should book in and have a biopsy just to be on the safe side. 

I made the appointment for the biopsy but I was more miffed about being told that I had an ‘age’ spot than anything else.  I was a very young 65 – where did he get off telling me I had an ‘age’ spot! 

Ellen Schafer 

A week later the biopsy that Barry took didn’t hurt a bit.  He told me that I should make an appointment again the following week so he could discuss the pathology results.  The truth is I don’t like going to doctors…….I have to be dying before I visit a doctor and these were all the reasons why.  Now there was another appointment to discuss the biopsy results.  I wished I had never raised the issue in the first place.  If it hadn’t been for the fact that I was up there with Sarah none of this stuff would be happening.  I chided myself for wasting the doctor’s time and especially my own. 

That was on a Monday so I made an appointment with Vicki, his receptionist, for the following Monday. At lunch time the next day however Vicki rang me and asked if I could come in to see Barry first thing the next morning.  She didn’t go into any detail just said that Barry wanted to discuss the biopsy results with me sooner rather than later.   

I put the phone down a bit shaken.  Surely the thing was not a real melanoma?   

The Appointment with Barry. 

I knew as soon as I saw Barry’s face the next morning that he had bad news for me.  The pathology report had confirmed my worst fears – it was a melanoma. 

Barry was talking about making an appointment with a surgeon today or tomorrow – he hoped the operation could be done as soon as possible. I felt like this was not happening to me.  I stopped him short and told him I might not choose to have an operation.  He told me very firmly that he was not even going to have that discussion with me as there was no alternative.  I protested some more……I was not having an operation until I saw a skin specialist.  He told me that seeing a skin specialist on the coast could take up to 2 or 3 months but under the circumstances he thought he could get me in to see someone either today or tomorrow. 

He picked up the phone and organized an emergency appointment for me to see Dr Pruen first thing the next morning.  I thanked him and taking the referral notice left the surgery. 

Actually Barry had been very kind in the way he conducted the visit.  We have known each other for 16 years but he had never put his arm around me before and told me I was going to be alright!  I think that scared me more than anything else. 

The whole thing took on a surreal feeling and even when I was sitting at the wheel of my car I could not believe what had just happened.  Me, Ellen Schafer, the bullet proof women had a cancer.  How did that happen to someone who ate all the right things (most of the time) who exercised regularly (most of the time) who had her life mapped out to be living to at least 84 which was the average family mortality (most of the time).   

Losing Control 

Never the less by the time I got into the skin specialist’s surgery the next morning I thought I was pretty much under control.  So I had to have something cut out of my leg – well that’s not the end of the world – what about women who got breast cancer – how much more scary would that be?   

I started to fill out the questionnaire the receptionist gave me to complete before I saw the doctor.  The first question was “Has any close relative (mother, father, sister, brother) in your family ever had a melanoma”?  My God….my mother had lost her left eye with a melanoma.  I felt that familiar fear race through my body as I showed the question to Kevin who was sitting beside me. Later on I found that some families have a genetic disposition towards melanomas (something the internet did not tell me). 

Twenty minutes later I sat on the edge of the surgery table waiting to see the specialist with nothing on but a flimsy cotton gown.  Suddenly a young man (Dr Pruen) appeared with a female assistant.  He looked at my leg and without hesitation told me it was a ‘classic’ melanoma.  He looked at the pathology report.  Asked me did I mind if he took a larger biopsy to pass on to the surgeon.  Then he told me he would be back in a few minutes to check my lymph nodes! 

Check Lymph nodes……..he wanted to check my lymph nodes…..what the hell did that mean?  I knew damn well what it meant– he wanted to know if the cancer had perhaps spread through my body. 

Now there was just Kevin and I in the room and I started to cry.  I was feeling sorry for myself.  Luckily I had 5 milligrams of valium in my handbag which I took then I settled back on the bed and waited for the doctor. 

He did a much larger biopsy (8 stitches) and physically checked the lymph node area nearest the melanoma site.  He said he could not detect any swelling and whilst that did not guarantee the cancer had not spread it was a very good sign.  He then referred me to a plastic surgeon at Cotton tree and I was booked into Buderim Private hospital for the operation the next day.   

The Operation 

I found myself at 6.30pm the next day waiting in the room outside the operating theatre to go into surgery.  I had read more about Melanomas in the last 48 hours than I had ever read about skin cancers in my whole life.  I was under no illusions - it was the deadliest type of skin cancer to have - but I also understood that if it was caught in time you had a 90% chance of survival.  Those were pretty good odds.   

I saw Barry the GP the day before I went into surgery- just to thank him.  He told me that it was fortunate that I had discovered the thing when I did.  He told me had I not discovered it until Christmas it could have been a much sadder story.  As it turns out I do not have to have any additional treatment but I do have to visit a skin specialist every 3 months for the next 7 years before I am considered to be in the clear. 

NO Coincidences – only Blessings! 

Do you believe in coincidences?  Well I don’t.   Everyone who knows me well also knows how I avoid going to the doctor.  So how amazing was it that I ended up in the doctor’s surgery that morning with Sarah?  How amazing was it that I noticed that tiny thumb nail picture of a melanoma above the magazines? 

This experience has put new meaning into my life.  I have always known that you should live your life to the full every moment of every day – but there is a difference between ‘knowing’ something like that and ‘understanding’ what it really means. 

There were patches in the last 5 weeks where I actually came to the realisation that I really could have a cancer that would kill me (and that might still be the case for all I know).  That was and is a very sobering thought.   So what lessons did I learn for the future? 

• I will never sweat the small stuff.
• I will never worry about money – only health.
• I will never forget that people are all that count.
• I will never fail to do what I want to do - if it’s at all possible.
• I will always remember that I am braver than I think– I might just have to make some adjustments- that’s all.

  You will be pleased to know that my recovery has been very good to date and I expect to be back at work - laying the law down as usual - as early as next week! 

Bye for now……………….Ellen